That’s Why We Have Two Hands
I prefer to think that we can, but that’s probably a little twisted for most people.
God and I hold hands while we masturbate so we feel closer to each other
You can’t masturbate when your hand’s on fire either. I mean, you can, but you’re going to seriously burn your bits.
Why can’t he wait till I’m done?
You also can’t hold hands with God while you’re typing, carrying something heavy, driving, etc… Of course, you couldn’t...